May 13

Violence and Bullying and More…

In life, we are thrown so many curve balls, obstacles, challenges and so much more. So many “things” that truly form us into the individuals we are. From a young age to the elders. Constant challenges and constant changes….

It’s not often that I let my walls down. However, this post, is quite possible, as personal as I will ever get. I’m not even sure if I will truly hit that “publish” button. “Why”? Because I’m just not sure I can do it. Maybe it’s too personal, maybe I don’t want to let my guard down, maybe it’s the reality that not all days are as “shiny” as some believe they are. At the same time, I feel like I have to put it out there because my sharing could in turn, help save another…

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The video below also pushed my mind into pushing these keys… WAY too often we hear stories of someone that for years, kept some sort of violence a secret. Verbal, physical. For one reason or another, they don’t want to let the secret out that someone is violently effecting their life. Not to mention the bullying that goes on in just about every school, I bet I could easily just say EVERY school out there. Individuals that use violence, bullying, aggression as a way to make themselves feel stronger. They use violence, aggression and bullying to cover up their own struggles. They use bullying, violence and aggression to control their partners or other individuals. And as this secret is kept, their violence and aggression grows. They begin to feel more powerful. They generally NEVER stop to think about what their actions are doing to their victims. And even if they do stop to think about it, rarely if EVER do they care.

These individuals do not DESERVE any ounce of respect. Their power is not super at all. What they do deserve is to be held accountable. And what their victims deserve is to be honest with the actions that are happening and to TELL ANYONE. Call 911, visit: Tell a friend, tell a parent. Tell a stranger. Because NO ONE deserves any sort of harm, abuse, aggression, threats or anything of the sort. NO ONE deserves it.

So here’s the thing…… (deep breaths Tim… Deep breaths…) I say this 48 hours after I was a victim of violence. Due to how personal this all is, and the fact I have children, I am not going to get into details on this post. However, I will say that I was physically attacked and in a position where I could do nothing about it other than trying to protect myself the best I could and to take the steps to protect those around me for the future. I REFUSE to let anyone harm another individual at all and get away with it. Feeling the pains in my body, yea… It’s rough. Right now though, with this one attack, it’s not the physical pains that push me to even talk about this. It’s the other pains. It’s walking the dog outside and hearing a vehicle or a jogger coming up behind me and building a defense, an insecurity, untrusting of who’s behind me and feeling as if I need to prepare myself to fight back. It’s jumping at the touch of  other individuals where there is actually only kindness and love.  It’s not feeling safe in my own surroundings. It’s not knowing why this happened or why I deserved it. (I didn’t) It’s hearing a noise while sleeping and jumping up because while the bruises begin to heal, the feelings, the memory, the visions of this attack do not….. Some may say, “what if this abuser reads this post and feels power by your words?” I will say this…. Should he read this. “I PROMISE that your actions will follow you FOREVER. I REFUSE to let your actions and attack effect the wonderfulness that is my life. I PROMISE that every step I can take against what you have done, I WILL… I REFUSE to let ANY part of this, take ANY piece of my future away. I PROMISE you will feel the effect of your actions and how they will FOREVER change pieces of your life.”

So why write this? Honestly, it’s not easy at all to actually share. It makes me vulnerable. However, I feel as if I share this. If I put this out there in the world that it may give even one more individual the strength to step up and tell someone that they’re being abused. Physically, verbally. I feel like if just one person can have the power to reach out for help to stop the violence. Then it was worth sharing….

If you feel as if you’re a victim please know that you deserve help. You deserve a better life and better days….

Reach out and visit:      1-800-799-7233

There isn’t a single individual out there that truly deserves any sort of abuse, harassment, threats or anything else. We can all help another.